Ruby Wilcock

Aliyah is unable to communicate like your typical 4.5yr old would, she is nonverbal meaning she cannot speak out her frustrations, her pains, if she’s hungry, needs the toilet, had a good or bad day in nursery, wants to go outside etc, the list goes on… Aliyah needs constant help and is unable to be toilet trained due to not understanding basic communication.

Along with these scenarios, she may not react to certain situations like we would. She cannot cope in an environment she isn’t familiar with, people she doesn’t see often or loud places / noises. Aliyah covers her ears or has what we call a “meltdown episode” to try and bring herself back down into her calm little world. Lewis Capaldi has been our absolute saviour, she is OBSESSED with listening to his songs on repeat and she will just sit and listen for hours on end in her cosy room. 

Facing these challenges means we avoid most places you’d love taking your child to; soft play, swimming pools, busy parks, splash parks, busy beaches, birthday parties, family events, you name it, we avoid. However, to give Aliyah the best life possible we attempt these places at the most quietest times e.g. when they open early morning. She absolutely LOVES being in the water.

Some may say “just take her, she’ll be fine”, but honestly, we really can’t sometimes. It’s putting us and Aliyah into such a difficult situation. Anybody who is in Aliyah’s life and understands when we’re unable to join events, we are so thankful for 💞.

As well as this, Aliyah has no sense of danger ⛔️. We have to keep Aliyah in reigns and have a close eye on her at all times. If we go to the park, we have to be next to her side to ensure she doesn’t go running onto the big field (she loves to run and loves grass) or run in front of a swing. She simply wouldn’t know to move out of the way. If she see’s something she wants to go to, she will go, no matter what or who is in front of her.

As you can probably tell, I treat Aliyah as if she’s my own. I am her second Mother, I will always protect her and do everything I can to help her on her journey. I’ve been so lucky to be in her life since she was 20 months old ♾️ 

Aliyah deserves to live life like any other, she deserves to be given opportunities to communicate, to socialise (in her own time) and to have lots of fun. 

We are now starting a new form of communication with her via photo boards and really hope in the future she will be able to use these. But for now, we have the task of getting her attention to show her them and continuously do so every single day, every time we go out, every bath time, every bed time, just everything. 

We do everything in our absolute power to fulfil her happiness and I think we do a pretty good job of it 💘. 

We have an amazing relationship with her Mum & Stepdad who we are in continuous contact with to ensure any form of communication about Aliyah’s day is passed on and share happy memories with eachother when she’s with either one of us. 

There’s a major lack of help out there for families and individuals with additional needs, and we for one never realised the major impact it has on your wellbeing until we faced it head on. 

Any small amount of support or understanding whether it be from family, work, friends or the government, is a MASSIVE help for families like us. It means everything. But unfortunately, there isn’t enough of it. 

Aliyah loves to sing, she does it from the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she goes to sleep (not that she needs to sleep much to gain her energy, sometimes it’s a 2am wake up call 🤭😅). 

She also loves to run EVERYWHERE no matter what time of day (or night) it is. 

Nothing makes us happier than when Aliyah has a good day; her smile and laugh is the most contagious thing in the world 🌍 

And for this reason, I will be running the 40K challenge in October for Autism UK. To raise awareness, more understanding and hope for more funds for those families in need.

Any donation is really really appreciated. This cause is majorly close to our hearts and means everything ❤️